Fenix

So it’s kind of like a peace (no mistake, just a bad pun) of the country smack bang in Richmond. A contrast to hustle and bustle within the Ikea next door at Victoria Gardens. Hovering amongst the trees, floating above a piece of the tranquil Yarra, exists a slick, modern fit out that is Raymond Capaldi’s diamond Fenix fine dining restaurant. Floor to ceiling windows allow a picturesque view of the banks of Melbourne’s mighty chocolate stream. The colour scheme continues in the stylish designer dining area that you’d suspect doesn’t come from a giant Swedish manufacturer.

One could sit for hours, chilling out, relaxing with the likes of Garry Lyon and Craig Kelly over a quality coffee and pistachio and fruit encrusted biscotti. Though there will be a need to satisfy the hunger. What better way than with the lunch special of a rich, cubed chicken liver with soft boiled quail eggs, new note crispy skinned kingfish decorated with brussel sprout petals in a balsamic sauce that M&Ms, melts in your mouth not in your hands, or heart attack on a plate served via a crispy skinned kurobuta pork belly that sits on a bed of sautéed cabbage, sweetened by a pumpkin puree, accompanied by fennel, swimming in a caramelised onion jus. Delicious and oh so naughty.

Fenix may have no connection to human kind’s answer for aesthetically pleasing, well priced home fittings, but it is truly a luxury leather Kramfor in the great M-Town.

3.5 / 5 yums!
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Where? 680-682 Victoria Street, Richmond, VIC
What? Set Lunch $36

Pushka

You’re on a hike in the Dandenongs, or the Blue Mountains. On the path… it’s safe, you see everything ahead. However, to the side, bare skin wading in the stream below. It captures your attention, crazy frog ringtone styles. It’s a route of danger… do you traverse down the slope to satisfy the curiosity or do you stay on the straight and narrow? Little Collins Street is the scene, Pushka is the destination. Tucked away around the corner of a graffitied alley way, an interesting watering hole away from the glitz that is one of the CBD’s fashion strips. Rustic, homely, grudgy, the perfect calm and a place to rest those sore feet from the shopping I’m sure the missas has been draggin your sorry ass around. Just remember this little place off the path… go ahead, take candy from the stranger and venture to find this coffee haven.

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Where? 20 Pesgrave Place, Melbourne, VIC

Federal Coffee Palace

Buckingham it ain’t, but seated on a throne (by throne I mean the pleather cushioned benches) at a hole in the wall favourite that’s nestled in the luxuriously restored heritage GPO building, makes you feel like royalty sipping on a Genovese coffee skinny flat white. It’s good, flavoursome coffee, done right. Wow… Camilla is a hottie… shite I think that’s the caffeine talkin… coffee that’s deliciously yummy.

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Where? GPO, Shop 23G, 350 Bourke St (Cnr Elizabeth St), Melbourne, VIC

Cicciolina

Rock up to the modest shop front that is Cicciolina, with your Bose docking station for the I-Pod that’s got Celebration” ready to be dropped and the Billecart Salmon cooling in the “You’ll Love” Coles chiller bag, because if you get a seat at one of the coolest places in M-town, you’re going to want to party like the artist formerly known as.

So if you’re allowed inside the type of ristorante that Henry Hill would have happily frequented, you’re in for a treat. It’s as if Cicciolina has put the place in the De Lorean, set it to 1970 and left it stranded. No one seems to mind. In fact the gorgeous jet black leather bucket chairs that mould to your rear along with the retro red that divide the wall bench is extremely charming against the darkly stained wooden table tops and skirtings. The big f-u coffee machine screams “this is Italy”.

Expecting as much charm from the food as your surrounds? You won’t be disappointed. The thin slices of Yellowfin Tuna Carpaccio is a must to start off, drizzled in a lime infused olive oil, providing a fresh tartness, balanced with salty capers and some charred sourdough. Yum.

A fine example of simplicity is found in the linguine, cooked el dente, made slippery by olive oil, made into a main meal with generous chucks of sealed Atlantic salmon, sautéed leek, spinach and capers. Mr Wolf’s lasagne may have an equal with Cicciolina’s version. Sheets of pasta, layered with a rich tomato ragu, prosciutto, mushrooms and basil. I don’t need Jimmy Conway to point a gun at my head to tell you it’s got all the things that a McCain’s home baked lasagne lacks. Oh, it’s damn good too.

Whilst there might be no access to a De Lorean to relive the meal, least there’s Kylie to remind one of the good times, come on.
3.5 / 5 yums!
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Where? 130 Acland St, St Kilda, VIC
What? Average Price $20





Left to Right : Yellowfin Tuna Carpaccio, Salmon Linguine, Lasanga

Norsiah’s Kitchen

Do you believe in love at first sight? Is it really possible to feel that strong connection with someone at just a glance? Wouldn’t you need to discover their personality to see if you’re compatible? What happens if you don’t like their scent? Does any of this matter?

So you inspect the catalogue, looking for… thumping for… you know… love. It contains mainly foreign items, of a Singaporean/Malaysian/Indonesian nature. It all looks pretty interesting, but there’s something about the Murtabak, which takes fancy. A roti shell, snuggling spiced halal mince and onion, served with a fishy, wet, red dipping curry. All this in a mouth makes a good combination. And it comes out in a fraction of the time a mail order bride to arrive. A dish of a rich, saucy gravy of capsicum, onion, peppers and spices stewed til the lamb is as tender as an unlaboured animal is sure to fire off those heat receptors in the brain. The only crime is there’s just not enough of it.

With its simple surrounds, whilst Norsiah’s may not service you like like a loving wife or husband (you collect your own cutlery and water), I’m sure you’ll find a little love here.

3 / 5 yums!
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Where? 101 D/604 Swanston Street, Carlton, VIC
What? Average Price $8



Left to Right : Murtabak

Pho Dakao Hoang

Neck and neck, they are flying home, Thanh Dat closes in on Hoa Tran and it looks like it’ll be a dead heat at the line in the Vietnamese Cuisine Stakes at Springvale. But wait! There’s a late charge by Pho Hoang on the outside. Fighting hard it is for the prize the winner receives: my custom and hard earned in exchange for some easy on the jaw spicy salt chicken spare ribs cube straddling springy textured flat egg noodles flavoured with a little soy and marinaded pork mince that’s comforting and tasty. Sliced rare beef pho is standard and doesn’t tread on anyone’s toes, the soup is barrel chested strong on the beef stock. Apple custard, a sweet drink which was more of an apple slushee, would be a more than worthy partner as you sit in a deck chair sunbaking by a five star hotel pool. Was a two horse race for Vietnamese food in Springvale. Enter a worthy challenger.

3 / 5 yums!
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Where? 8d/17 Balmoral Ave, Springvale, VIC
What? Average Price $8





Left to Right : Apple Custard, Spice Salt Chicken Ribs on Noodles, Beef Pho

Clamms Fast Fish

Quality fish and chips. Fast.

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Where? 93 Dundas Pl, Albert Park, VIC